January 28 1816: I Dare Not Feel Anything Now

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On  January 28 1816, Lady Byron writes to Augusta Leigh, from Kirkby Mallory.

Private. Jan. 28,

It is not my intention to discontinue my consideration; of B.’s welfare, which have hitherto guided me in every thing, if they can be of any service or comfort to you. Consult me therefore whenever you please, excepting only that I must request to be left at present wholly ignorant of his sentiments concerning myself; and, should it be desirable for my parents to know them, you can give the information either directly through Mrs Clermont. It must not be known that I had anticipated to you my father’s communication, as it would be prejudicial to me and mine. As far as it is possible to judge at a distance, 1 think he had better not know, or be encouraged to believe the power he may have over my feelings, as the desire to work upon them might lead him to measures more hurtful to himself. The Paris scheme was very near executed in the Summer. Much more hereafter if you wish to have it: I dare not feel anything now. You can show the enveloppe or not as you please.

 

 

 

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